I hate seeming like I’m complaining or crying lol but I woke up this morning like many other mornings, questioning what I want out of life. At 22 years old, Where am I going? What am I doing? What is my purpose and am I on my way to fulfilling it or am I wasting time on bullshit? It so hard to separate the real from the fake. The bullshit in the world from what can actually benefit you. What looks glamorous and feels right right now but will it be around next month or even tomorrow, whether that's people or trends.
Finding your niche in this world, I think, is one of the hardest things to do. Especially when it seems like everyone around you has found theirs. When everyone LOOKS like they’ve got it all figured out. Especially now with social media and everyone trying to LOOK like life is perfect. Comparing ourselves to one another is at an all time high, whether you know your doing it or not. Whether your literally saying, “why is that not me” or not, we all compare in one way or another. (This is how some people form into “haters” - that's a whole other discussion though) You wake up in the morning and whats the first thing you do? Hop on IG, Twitter and SnapChat. I know I do. Constantly looking at everyone else’s life. And of course we are happy for those around us! I know I am! But it can also make you feel like your not doing quite enough. And these things can affect you with something as small as, “why is everyone on Snap having such a wonderful day & I’m not?” to something as big as, “why are they the same age as me and working their dream job or living in Cali or able to live everyday like its their last?” At some point you may ask yourself, what am I doing wrong?
But never let looking at someone else’s life, make you think your not doing enough or your not where your suppose to be. Everyone's journey is different. Your admiring that person, while they could be admiring you. Looking at your life wondering why you have it so made. Its all about perspective. When people talk to me, i always hear “oh you doing big things” “oh look at Ms. Celebrity” “whats up superstar”, or whatever it may be. I've even had guy say they felt like I was out of their league because I’m doing such big things. But in my head I’m like, I'm NOWHERE near where I wanna be! I should be further in life! and nor am I a superstar (yet haha). I'm still tryna make it in my head, but to others, yea I’m still growing and expanding but I'm STILL DOING WELL! Perspective.
Things take time to grow. Figure out what your good at and focus on that. Nurture that. And even finding what your good at can be a challenge. I know I'm STILL trying to figure that out exactly what I'm good at.
What I did to help me was:
1. write a list of things I like, things I enjoy doing.
2. write a list of things you think your good at
3. ask close friends and family (CLOSE friends and family) what they believe your good at and what your best qualities are. (not saying you need other people’s opinions but those who love and support you, always see things in you that you don’t see in yourself. asking them could help you boost/confirm what you already know or open your mind to something you didnt know you had or weren’t thinking to expand on)
4. (the hardest part of them all) PICK ONE THING TO FOCUS ON! Just ONE! I know you may have so many thoughts, ideas and things you wanna work towards but focus on one at a time. (I’m still trying to conquer this myself) Put all your energy into that one thing
5. Understand that patience and consistency is KEY!! Nothing happens overnight.
Like I said, Im still working towards fixing myself. Being comfortable with my journey of life and knowing that everything happens for a reason and when its suppose to. Not necessarily when you want it to. So be patience and consistent in everything you do! And don’t stress! You’re doing fine : )